An Ode to Ortmeyer

As most of you have already heard, Jed Ortmeyer will not be back as a memeber of the Sharks next year.

It's a sad announcement, as it means losing a man with a very inspirational story and amazing work ethic who fit in well and was a nice addition to the Sharks. He wasn't the flashiest player or the biggest point getter, but he was solid and reliable, and a decently defensive minded winger, and that's going to be missed.

Possibly the greatest loss of this move is the sudden absence of Patrick Marleau's long lost eyebrow brother. They were like the eyebrow twins. Wonder twins, even. Imagine what amazing this could have happened had we only let them truly discover their powers. Imagine what greatness wonder twin eyebrows could have wrought.

Truly, these are sad days.

Look at those eyebrows. You can't tell me that he and Patty aren't somehow related.

You'll be missed Jed. Good luck wherever you go.